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Postcard #7: Songs from the Dust

by entertainment for the braindead

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The Fire 06:18
I dreamt I had a fire, illuminating all. it fed on my desire and as a blazing ball it rose into an empty sky and turned black into blue and burned away my chain so I could turn away from you. I dreamt we had a fire, well-kept throughout the night, and we and our desire were sleeping by its side. but in the morning it would rise, magnificent and bright, so you and I and our disguise dissolved into its light. no water could quench, no waves could devour what never was real and never was ours. and when I awoke, afraid alone, the fire was out. a garden had grown.
The Water 05:09
Have had so many images flickering through me at night when I sleep. don‘t remember their outlines, don‘t remember those names and faces. but their shadows, they dance through the caves in my head, blurry shapes on the walls. and their shadows still dance through my head. looked in so many eyes in bewilderment, blind to stories they tell. have heard all of your voices try to pronounce the unspeakable. and their echoes, they bounce through the caves in my head, resonate from the walls. and their echoes still bounce through my head. and their echoes still bounce through my head. the moon is full. my glass is empty. and yet as heavy as before we are crying in silence and laughing out loud when all eyes are on us. stay away with your sadness, don‘t remind them we‘re all just flesh and bone. I‘m so thirsty, give me water, and I won‘t mind it‘s thick with sorrow and salt. I‘m so thirsty, I will drink it all. I‘m so thirsty, give me water, I won‘t mind if it is heavy with salt, and your sorrow, I will drink it all. the moon is full the glasses empty and we are lighter than before
The Air 04:21
Count to three and open your eyes. know that each single one of those lashes is heavier than my heart: the lightest breeze lifts it up high, the softest wind sends it far away. how or where from I came I seem to forget. how can anyone fail to remember what place they belong, what place they‘re at? I hear the the wind in the trees, it‘s longingly calling for me. I‘m the fine, grainy sand, I take to the breeze, I‘ll keep it company. in the morning rinse off the dust off your plates. yet a few grains of sand in your coffee will keep you reminded of your fate. being this fragmented and spread, this weightlessly small, my pieces lie there in your hand. then scattered and tossed by the storm, I follow its call, not questioning where I will land. the strongest gust rips me apart. yet a few grains of me in your coffee will keep you reminded of my heart. the lightest breeze lifts me up high. the softest wind sends me far away.
The Earth 04:32
I am the soil, I lie to your feet. I catch every fall of yours, support every step you make. I let you walk all over me. remember I am in you and you‘ll be me. I swallowed the old members of your family. and every time you eat you‘ll eat a fruit of me til one day you‘ll return into this unity. I am the beginning, I held you in my embrace. your eyes are now open, see: I will be your way home, with both feet still on the ground again I‘m your family. however far you seem to get from me, I still will be the center of your gravity. the ball of fire I host inside of me gives light to those who don‘t forget they‘re part of me. grow stronger, grow lighter, lie down on the earth to sleep, your mother, your family a fistful of dirt - you can throw it in their face, or water it and plant a seed and wait and be amazed. a wistful word, whispered gently in her ear to sprout and grow and bloom in her and never be erased. I am the soil, I lie to your feet. I catch every fall of yours, support every step you make. I let you walk all over me.
Silence 04:36


The journey.
I watch the campfire crackle as the sun fades. A rock on a mountain is my home, a small sheltered place where I cut avocados in half and burn things I need to get rid of along with those dry twigs and branches. Some melodies sprout on lush lawns in the park, remember them, record them half asleep in the blue dreamy haze in the evening.
One moment she‘s a stranger at a downtown traffic light. And in the next I‘m drowning in a twisted life‘s long story, being poured into my ear so boldly and yet trustfully sincere, that I don‘t dare to run, although I never asked about her foster parents, nor about her alcoholic husband, her despair.
Out there in the desert I find dust and heat and horseflies. The wind out here, when coming as a gentle, cooling breeze, can bring relief from all that makes the place unbearable - but also be unbearable itself, tear camps apart, press dust into the tents and trailers, there‘s no way to block it when you have no house.
But living under the sky for two months and a half, you‘ll get used to all that. And learn to cherish that the ground is firm and that the wind is cooling. That there is water there, replenishing your strength, and people, and a fire burning when it‘s cold at night. The desert‘s your home. And it makes for a powerful teacher.
Slab City, May 2013


released June 7, 2013

these songs were written, mixed and arranged by Julia Kotowski aka. entertainment for the braindead, recorded en plein air in spring 2013 in the Southern Californian desert. To be released as the seventh and last in a series of acoustic Postcards in June 2013.
the ocean drum on The Earth was played by Magpie Malcolm. thanks fo that!

special thanks to Tom who was a sister and Neil who was a puzzle to me, to Cuervo and Wil, my Slab family and other companions. I‘m sure we‘ll soon meet traveling again.




entertainment for the braindead Berlin, Germany

Julia Kotowski, based in Berlin, weaves her sonic universe from shy song lines, small instruments and field recordings, carefully wraps them in paper cut-outs and serves them with home-made ginger cookies. And coffee.

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